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Thursday, November 03, 2005

This Week in Fogging (Nov 4)

[photo caption] Someone cue up the "Jaws" theme...he's baaaaccckkk...

St. Paul, Minn-

Basketball's back, which leads to this question:
How long until Ron Artest bites someone's ear off? Chomps a finger? Goes into the stands to attack a kid holding a can of popcorn? Wait...

Self-indulgent moment of the week:
Escaping to Dunn Bros. instead of giving sugar to snot-faced punks on Halloween. I don't like holidays. Or birthdays.

Just Because:
"Jokes n' jokes n' jokes n' jokes
Unh-ah-ah-ah
Spaghetti spaghetti spaghetti"
-- Dave Chappelle

Humorous bumper sticker observed recently:
"Jesus loves you; Everyone else thinks you're an asshole."

Names I'd like to see the Vikings interview:
Herm Edwards (NY Jets); Jeff Fisher (Tennessee Titans); Brian Billick (Baltimore Ravens); Mark Richt (University of Georgia); Karl Dorrell (UCLA); Pete Carroll* (USC / *only if Norm Chow signs on to be the O.C.)

This computer is now:
Wireless (I can't rave enough about wireless computing. Absolutely amazing. I'm glad I quit building barns and furniture with my bare hands and came into the 21st Century.)

Best post on Craig's List in the past week:
"This is a note to whomever decided it would be a good idea to steal my Cinelli Argento Viva from 28th and Lyndale by the church, the one with the Schwinn cord lock on it and the leather Belt saddle. I dont appreciate it. Give it back. If I see you riding it I will call the police. If I see anyone with this bike I will call the cops. I know what it looks like and I would probably be able to spot it even if you painted it. This bike means a lot to me for reasons I dont want to get into. Im poor and it takes me a long time to buy nice things, I know its been a while since it was stolen, about a month but ive been busy. Anyway my names Benjamin 612 870 2576. Call me if you want to give it back. If you give it back there will be no problems, in fact I will probably give you a f-----g cookie. You probably think I just ditched it but no, I had intended to come and fetch it eventually, (the wheel fell off while I was riding it), I had another bike, a blue Motobecane but it got stolen that same week because I didnt lock it for like 2 seconds. Then I was borrowing my girlfriends bike and some crackhead pushed me off it to try and take it but by then I was all fed up with my bad bike mojo so I busted him in his nose and teeth. Anyway, you can see what a crappy time Ive been having in the world of bicycles, which is usually a magical whimsical land that brings me much joy and sparkling radiance, so, think about it, I have a photographic memory and I may see you riding it, I would then call the cops. They may not catch you then but I would remember what you look like and then Id see you at the wedge or something wearing one of those fake mustaches and glasses, one of those Groucho Marx getups, and I would have the cops there in a heartbeat so I could rip off your mustache all dramatic like and embarass you in front of all the yuppies. So, what Im trying to say is , Id like to have my bike back. Thank you. thornestockton2002@yahoo.com"

Best basketball movie ever:
Fletch
[photo caption] Fletch: 6'5", 6'9" with afro.

Names I'd like to see the Vikings avoid like the plague:
Mike Tice; Dennis Erickson; Les Steckel; Jim Fassell; Ron Gardenhire; Dick Jauron; Ted Cottrell; Chris Palmer; Jimmy Rodgers; Dom Capers

Guilty Pleasure:
Casper and Runyon's Nook (Hamline at Randolph, St. Paul)

Humorous bumper sticker observed recently, redux:
"We're all wearing the blue dress now"

Just say "No" to Supersizing:
What did LA Lakers coach Phil Jackson do with his year off? My guess is that he ate. A lot. I feel bad for the buttons on this coat (photo below). That's cruel and unusual. Wow.

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