Thursday, March 23, 2006

Cat6 Training Camp: Day 1

[photo caption] The topography of 53 miles worth of Wedsnesday's ride. (photo courtesy of Ozark Cycling Club)

2006 Cat6 Training Camp: Day 1

After an all-night driveathon, the Cat6 Team arrived in beautiful and scenic Ozark, Missouri. The first order of business was to check in to the Cat6 HQ – in this case, the Days Inn – Ozark. Unfortunately for us, the Days Inn was sticking to their 2pm check-in time. It was 8am.

What to do? Take a page out of Superrookie’s playbook, that’s what! Waffle House, here we come! After Tuffy had ordered his “MVP Breakfast”, Fil asked the Question of the Day. Here’s how that dialogue went:

Fil: “What exactly are grits?”
Waitress (staring at Fil as if he is the biggest moron on the planet): “Harmefisoiuzy.”
Fil: “What?”
Waitress: “Harmefisoiuzy.”
Fil (with a blank expression): “Toast and hashbrowns, please.”

Tuffy’s impressions of southeastern Missouri so far:
--Stereotypes are stereotypes because they’re stereotypes, know what I’m saying?
--Whenever the churches are consistently larger in physical size than the schools in the area, that’s a bad sign.
--After spending 30 seconds in Ozark, it’s very clearly understood why a) Kerry lost the election and why b) Bush uses his Texas ranch as a Hollywood-esque backdrop.
--Ozark is the blue collar town; Nixa is the yuppie enclave.
--Ozark is the blue collar town; Branson is the blue hair town.
--Doing a 70+ mile ride this afternoon on 3 hours of sleep, 1 MVP Breakfast, 2 rolls of chewy sprees, 1 Mountain Dew, 1 large cup of coffee, 6 jawbreakers, and a handful of crackers is going to hurt. Bad.


PS: We’re actually scouting the route for the 3rd Annual Dogwood Classic road race today. While we’ll be doing our best impression of Postal checking out those Pyrenees stages, it will certainly be unfortunate that George Hincapie won’t be around for us, unlike Lance and Co., to pick on.

81.2 miles, 5.5 hours. We got back to HQ after dark -- not a good idea, but not planned, either. The major malfunction was planning ride time based on Minnesota standards -- forgot to plan on all of the hills.

And this race is going to be a monster -- 53 miles of four major climbs and descents, with the first 2o miles all uphill. This caused Cat6 to state our race tactics as such: no attacks/sit in/sit in/sit in/if a chance to sprint towards the end appears, take it/end.


Anonymous uber pookie said...

mvp special.

never take the grits. but if you must add the cheese!


good luck in the race.

Fri Mar 24, 05:33:00 AM 2006


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